Since the mafia seems to have temporarily returned, I wanted to provide a short list of terms to help the average reader navigate these challenging times (until the cops catch up to the robbers).

• Counterfeit money – Cryptocurrency
• Illegal Gambling – Prediction Markets
• Illegal Drug traffic – Medicinal Use
• Racketeering – AI Supremacy
• Shakedown – Liberation Day
• The Hit – Get a vaccine
• Whack – turn on 5G WiFi
• Mob Boss – POTUS
• Goodfellas – Administration
• Wiseguys – DOGE
• Connected Guys – Lobbyists
• Silicon Valley Mafia party – Lavender Haze
• Golden Age – The Big Beautiful Bill
• Made man – Big Balls